Listening to the Voices in my Head

Left knee is hurting

A lot today. I can't keep from involuntarily crying out, or making noise behind my clamped shut lips. I don't know what's changed since yesterday, or from the past months, but today is the first time I have taken pain meds.

Part of me is relieved that pain relief is on its way, and another part of me is ashamed to have caved into it.

Seems Dr N's course of treatment is working

I have been on Ozempic for almost 6 weeks. Turns out I am a 'textbook example' of insulin resistance. With the exception of slight nausea when I followed the protocol of increasing dose to .50 from .25mg, I have had no other reactions.  Dr N does want blood tests to see how my liver is handling it. He's not worried, it's just standard procedure.

So far, I have lost 6kgs (13lbs 4oz) in 6 weeks.  My appetite, which has never been all that great, has reduced a bit, but I am still pretty much staying with the same things I have been doing. Dr told me not to change what I have been doing, because I have been doing everything right.

Yippy!

Today is the 4th week I stabbed myself. With a pre-load injection of Ozempic.

Now, I haven't changed my diet, or exercise routine. And I have lost a little over 3kgs (close to 7lbs) already. Huzzah for something that battles insulin resistance for non-diabetics!

It's gonna be fun the next time I tell someone taking my information down, when I mention two medications, and she tells doctor, or MRI tech "6X year old female diabetic" and I pull her up short. I am not diabetic, and ask her to read the 2nd reason people would take those two medications.

The Chemical Experiment That Is My Life... a new hope.

After consulting with a doctor who knows me, knows my history, even down to my eating and exercise habits, after a blood test to see if I was diabetic (I'm not. BGLs are perfect), I have finally been diagnosed with "Acute metabolic disorder". 

The new chemical in my life is "Ozempic".  A once a week injection. Needle is ultra fine, don't even feel it going in. Stings a bit 15 minutes later, but no biggie.

The only downside of this is Medicare/PBS (Pharmaceutical Benefits Scheme to my U.S. friends) doesn't cover Ozempic unless you're a diabetic.  Private health cover does cover it, but only up to X amount of dollars a year.  I shall be grateful for small favors.

A visit to my G.P. aka another chapter of the chemical experiment that is my life.

I had made an extended appointment as I had some issues to discuss with him, but when Wing  found out I was going, he decided that he could use the extended time.  Well, let's just say I have not problem discussing personal issues with my G.P. but it's funny watching Wing turning redder and redder, and looking anywhere but at either of us.

I got prescription kerfuffle fixed, and refills for what has run out. Oh happy day, I found out that even with all the different meds, I can still take my migraine medicine.
As to Wing's issue, his gout is acting up. Muhahaha! The peanuts are mine! ALL MINE! Eh, they'll be in the air tight container waiting for him.

Tomorrow, I get to see Matt the Torturer! (aka physiotherapist) even earlier in the morning than I saw my G.P.  And I am NOT a morning person.

On a different note, I have been waiting for some books by Rosemary Edghill to become available for Kindle for some years.  I finally broke down and got the trilogy called the 12 Treasures. What happened to the other 9? Let's call it an early Yule present for me.

Oh wow.

I just came home from my appointment with Dr H. I told him about the Monday Mistake and my knee having no pain on Tuesday. I then old him about how I re-created the Monday Mistake, and had the same results the following day. I have been taking 300mg twice a day for the past two days, and have had no knee pain.

He said the almost instant relief of pain shows it is definitely neuropathic pain. I am now officially on 300mg capsules twice a day.

Dr H did tell me that I have to be careful not to over strain my leg, as the muscles and structures around it are weak from using a brace and crutches, but ya know something. I am just so jazzed by the fact that yes, it's not all in my head, it is neuropathic pain, and there is light at the end of the tunnel... and it's not New Jersey! ;)

I am going to experiment on myself.

Not going to take a chance with the seizure meds this time, but I'm holding off taking the morning nerve pain meds until later in the day. How much later will depend on how bad the nerves start jangling along the fasciotomy scar and the left knee.

If getting as close as I can to repeating what I did Monday evening today, Thursday, and get the same results on Friday, I'm going to have to have a serious discussions with GP and pain specialist. Because if it's the same under medicate me for years bullshit I had to put up with regarding hypothyroidism, I don't have another 20 years to wait for them to pull their thumbs out of their asses.

Being undermedicated?

I was quite sore from my out and about on Saturday and Sunday. Monday was hectic, and I ended up forgetting to take my morning meds (lorazepam, Lyrica, Duloxetine, and Celaxib) I didn't realize it until after dinner. Then it dawned on my why I was in so much pain all day.  So, I took my morning meds, stayed up late, and took the nighttime Lyrica. I skipped the night dose of lorazepam)

Went to bed, and woke up Tuesday morning, with leg a bit stiff.  I got up and walked around, and it took me about 10 minutes to realize my left knee, with the exception of my arthritis twinge I'm used to, had zero pain.  All day Tuesday, I was up and about doing things without pain.

Today is Wednesday...  and I have to say that my left knee feels better than it did Monday, but worse than it felt Tuesday.  This makes me want to try what accidentally happened Monday night again.  I also have a feeling I am being under medicated regarding the nerve pain.  Personally, I think taking 300mgs of Lyrica along with 60mgs of Duloxetine tackled the nerve pain.  Yes, I will be making appointment with my GP to find out about this. I'm also keeping a diary regarding pain levels.

Saw Dr L today

But this time, I had hubby wait somewhere. 

I'd felt last time that D L had a chip on his should regarding my husband calling and nagging him to push my appointment up. And that it was reflected in how talked at me, instead of to me.  All fixed.

He says that concerning my knee problem, I have 'realistic expectations’.  I'm not looking for my knee to magically feel all better. What I want is the pain level of 5 to 7 on a daily basis to lurk around three.  I'm functional at that pain level.  And I need a good night's sleep.  Dr L has given me a prescription that I am to have filled one month after taking 60mgs of Duloxetine a day, a low dose of something (forgot the name) to take around 7pm, in hopes it makes sleeping easier.

Also told me no need to split the Dulox 30mg caps to one in the morning and one at night, but to take the full 60 in the morning.
I told Dr L I was beginning to feel like a pharmaceutical experiment. He said basically, that's true. We are trying to find the right combination to get the nerve pain under control

I feel like a walking pharmaceutical experiment

Been on the Duloxetine for a few weeks.  I saw GP last week, and I told him how it would wear off late in the afternoon, or early evening. Because of that, pain was getting up up at night.  Dr H suggest I go with a 60mg dose in the morning. Uhh, seeing how Dulox hammers me with nausea, dizziness, drowsiness, I made the suggest about taking 30mg in the morning, and 30 before I had off to bed.  This was amenable to Dr H. Tonight will be 2nd night taking Dulox before heading to bed.

Saw both psychiatrist and psychologist. Yes, I have depression. Yes, I have suicidal thoughts. I sometimes actually cried when I woke up, because I woke up. Be that as it may, I'm not doing anything that will prevent me from waking up.  Both have told me when I'm not being rocked with pain all the time, the depression should be alleviated.

Still hopeful.